I can never decide what to write when I’m staring at the blank screen. It’s so….empty.
Sometimes I want to write what I’m thinking; mostly, I feel the need to catalog my day. It’s as though I can tell my state of mind simply by remembering what I did, where I went, what I saw.
Tonight is a little bit of both. There’s so much happening, not happening, swirling around. And there are so many thoughts, too. And a rant, if you’re lucky.
Ike, my cousin in town for the holiday weekend, and I went to the Art Museum today. I spent a lot of time trying to think of something that he might like to do; I didn’t want to disappoint him. We had a good time, checking out all of the art as we chatted. As we got back to Grandma’s door, we were talking about how we’ve never hung out as adults (we were born two weeks apart but are separated by so much – experience, space, time, etc). “It’s nice to meet you,” he said. It’s nice to meet you too, Ike.
This painting was fabulous, but strange. I liked the way that Ike melded chromatically into it.
This painting caught my eye. It was painted in 1898, yet the colors are still so vibrant.
Lately, I’ve been hearing a lot of mixed opinions about the fact that I blog so much about my life. First of all, this is hardly scratching the surface. This doesn’t serve as a diary. It’s not my every thought or feeling. Trust me – what you see is not always what you get here. Sometimes, yes.
This is my place to collect things. I love reviewing it. Sometimes I’m struck by my insight, other times I disagree with my past self entirely. Sometimes I use this a marker, to see how much I’ve grown as a person. Sometimes it’s just purely nostalgic. To be honest, there are moments when it’s downright embarrassing.
Either way, the same thing holds true now that has always held: If you don’t like it, don’t read it. There are other blogs. But there are no other Katie Barry’s. (Actually, there are. I’m Facebook friends with most – many – of them. They’re a fun bunch.)
I’m going to spare you the rant I’d decided I wanted to throw here. Hopefully when I sleep on it, it will turn into something more beautiful than the angry ball it is right now. It’s about honesty. Honesty with yourself and with everyone around you. It’s one of the things I value more than anything else in this world. I live by full disclosure (mostly). I believe that the truth of our reality lies in our experiences. If you can come to terms with events and realizations as they occur, you’re more able to process, cope, understand. The understanding that comes from honesty beats anything kept hidden by a shroud of secrecy.
Sleep sweet, world.