Update. Quick.

It’s been a really long summer, actually.
Even though time is flying by, I have yet to feel really at ease.
I’m tense, always. I’ve got a lot on my mind.
Classes start tomorrow. I’m already exhausted.
It’s emotionally draining, these relationships, both with friends and lovers.
I’ve been walking a lot lately, trying to get in shape. I’ve been eating healthier, trying to cut out as much sugar as possible (so hard when you’re a fiend like I am).
Remember surgery in January? Well, it did nothing, basically. So I’m trying to somehow make my body strong enough to fight off all of this. I’m joined an internet support group that caters to the growing number of women suffering like I am, suffering worse. But it’s always bad news, so I try not to read their desperate posts. I’m hoping I’ll never have to post one, full of anger, or fear, or pain.
It’s never far from my mind, and even though I hope for the best, the worst haunts me. I’d rather be plagued by persistent obnoxious ghosts than plagued by this. It’s terrifying.
It’s taking a lot of my energy, and everyday I try to let it go a little bit.
My room is still in shambles. I’ve lost my need to be inside. The beach has been calling.
Today was the Gay Pride Parade in Boystown. Maddie and I went to watch the parade, see the protesters (who were ridiculously cruel, by the way) and to get some lunch. After, we headed to another neighborhood to browse and then returned home. Bar trivia tonight, hopefully lots of sleep, and then a long day tomorrow.
The end, for now.
Summer is beautiful, slipping so fast.

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